Tuesday, March 27, 2012

108.8

I was surprised to see those numbers this morning. Especially because I didn't feel like I had lost anything. So this morning I found out that my BMI is 19.9. In order for me to stay in the normal range and not go underweight, my weight has to stay at 102 or above. I'm not sure how I feel about all of this weight loss. At the beginning of September of last year, I was 140. So since then, I have lost 31.2lbs. I mean, I'm happy that I've lost so much weight, but the problem is, I don't see it. There are certain parts of my body where I can notice it. Example; I can see my shoulder blades, my collar bone, there's a gap in my thighs now, and my chest is smaller. But my legs are still flabby, my hips are still and probably always going to be wide (thanks kids lol), and my stomach, ugh my stomach is repulsing. I hate my stomach. It's the biggest problem area on my body. I barely look good in clothes, let alone naked. So I did something this morning that I'm not sure if I want to follow through with. I called this lady who is a therapist and she works strictly with girls with eating disorders. I left her a message, but I'm not sure what I would be getting myself into. I just want someone to talk to right now. But I don't want to go into recovery, does that make sense? So I'm debating on posting before and after pictures of this weight loss adventure, but not sure if I feel comfortable yet. I didn't eat breakfast this morning and right now I'm eating Ramen Noodles. I want to take the boys to the park because it's so nice outside, and I'm starting to feel a bit better. So maybe after I'm done eating. I want to say thank you for all the love and support I have been getting through here. It's truly amazing. Much love!
XOXO Katie
This girl is sooo pretty
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4 comments:

  1. JustSharMarch 27, 2012 at 12:56 PM

    No she really isn't you can see her ribs shes not healthy..its your disorder it clouds everything out takes away the real you..I was there got down to 88 lbs, couldnt walk, couldnt function my body was so used to doing it that even if I wanted to keep something down I couldn't...youve had 3 kids your busy isn't & will never be the same I pray you get help...I did find the courage..

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  2. AnonymousMarch 27, 2012 at 1:05 PM

    I hate that it's so hard to see all the progress we have made :/ I'm sure she would be ok just talking to you and it will help things not get out of control :)
    Have fun at the park - fresh air is good :)
    Lottie x

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  3. Depressed Skinny Mess.March 27, 2012 at 3:24 PM

    I hate not seeing progress too, all i see is fat and flab :( It's good you made contact with someone who could help, you don't have to go into recovery, but talking to someone may help?? Thankyou for your comment, following back xx

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