Monday, April 23, 2012

104 Exact

Yesterday and today that's what I've weighed in at. I had a very weird experience Saturday night. We ordered Silvermine Subs around 10:30pm, they delivered around 11 and then we started watching a movie. I also got a cup of Cheddar and broccoli soup. I ate that first. Then purged that. Then about half way through my sandwich, my body started having a complete freak out. First it was my chest, then the middle of my back and then my lower stomach. They all hurt to the point where I couldn't even breath. My body was forcing me to purge. As soon as I purged, all that pain went away. It was so weird. My body was rejecting the food. It was pretty scary actually. Yesterday I felt like I ate way too much. After dinner last night, when I went to purge, there was blood. Not a little, quite a bit actually. It wasn't dark red, so I know it wasn't any of my organs. I think I scratched the back of my throat pretty badly. So T said, alright, something has to change. I agree with him. But it's so hard. I'm 4lbs away from my goal. 4! That's it. So this morning, I made two egg whites and 3 strawberries (48cal). I didn't purge them (although a half hour later, I regretted it, tried to purge and it didn't happen.) Then I did my 200 crunches and 50 leg lifts. So those calories got burned. Then I went for a 2.5 mile walk. I wanted to go longer, but it's just way too hot. Now I'm my calorie intake is -235. But now I'm about to eat a hot pocket. I will probably purge that. Too many calories not to. I don't know if I'm going to do dinner tonight. T will be at work late, so maybe I can get away with skipping dinner. I don't have much else to right. I hope everyone is having a great day. Much love.
XOXO Katie

3 comments:

  1. That's scary! Good job keeping the food down. I know it's crazy scary to keep food down but keep working on it. If your body is freaking out you might want to see a Dr. Just to understand why it happened. IDK Just a thought. Hang in there sweet girl.

    Hugs!

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  2. My body does that. I think it has become so used to purging and keeping nothing in. So when I eat with no intention to purge, it almost dies!

    Blood is never good but somehow it never seems to deter us from purging. No matter how much it worries us. :/ xx

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  3. Been there you see that pic on my page of me in 1985 where I was so skinny and all my bones sticking out...thats when I was where you are now but I was 88 lbs and didnt know my body/viral organs were starting the process of shutting down....your gorgeous period I'm gonna be brutally honest here cuz I love you if you keep going you'll look like I did in that pic and now I know why I was single, it takes a toll on you ya I was skinny but I looked 90 like I belonged in a nursing home....plz I beg you find yourself dont be like me. I thank god everyday now that I finally got the help I needed and even tho I'm so heavy now I know god & my man love me just the way I am xoxo

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