This is my cursed number

I weighed in at 104.4 again this morning. I was stuck at this number for 2 weeks, then went up, then came back down yesterday. I swear this is my cursed number. I want to be 100. 4 freaking pounds. Give me something here. I have been working out like a mad woman. Doing 3-4 hours a day. And a total of 400 crunches a day. I feel amazing and wonderful when I work out. And then I ruin it because I'm hungry afterwards and want to eat. So then I eat/purge/workout again. Today I managed to keep a half of a power bar down but that was only because we were hiking. So I had 115 calories that I kept in myself. I burned 464 calories on the hike. Then a few hours later, I went to the gym, burned 400 calories there, then came home and did my first set of 200 crunches. I will be doing another set tonight before bed. T swears up and down that he can see 4 abs, but I DO NOT see anything. I think he is just telling me that to make me feel better. Ever since I came home from the gym, which was about 3 hours ago, I have had so much energy and I can't figure out why. I feel like I drank a ton of energy drinks, which I don't because those things are nasty. I have been so active today, so I am praying that I will weigh less tomorrow. T thinks that if I keep up all the crunches that I will have a flat stomach within a couple weeks. That would be amazing. But he now thinks that I am over doing it on the working out. I don't think so. My therapist yesterday told me she wants me to learn how to spend "healthy me time." Meaning for the 1 hour in the morning when my oldest is at school and my youngest is down for a nap, she doesn't want me to cook, clean, do dishes, or laundry or work out. Um, she realizes I have two kids right and a whole family to cook for? So I don't know what I am going to do. I can't read because my mind goes a million miles per hour because I KNOW that I should be doing something else. But anyway, I guess I will find something. I have too much energy to just keep typing, and now I'm just rambling on. I will update a better blog tomorrow, hopefully with a lower number. Much love.
XOXO Katie